So I guess I'll start this one off with explaining how I injured myself. I slipped on some grease in the kitchen at work, landed on my tailbone, hit my head, and screwed up my wrists pretty badly. I guess being hurt is what kicked this whole thought process off. I had to take care of myself and nurse myself back to health alone. And that's when I realized how lonely I actually am. I have everything I could want at this point...a job, a car, friends, money...the only thing I'm missing is someone to share it with. Yeah yeah yeah everyone always says you gotta find happiness within yourself. Well guess what, those same people who say that are the ones that either have someone already, or lying to themselves as well because they know if they didnt have anyone, they would being in the same position I'm in now. I mean let's be honest people. Who wouldnt want someone who is their best friend that they can also be intimate with? It's what I crave more than ANYTHING at this point. To say I've been fucked over many times is an understatement. It's happened so many times now that I expect it; it's the norm.
More and more of my friends are getting married, and having kids that I'm sort of
jealous. All my life has been so focused on my career and acting that I kind of miss what non-creative people have. Like how would my life have turned out if I did normal shit and was like an english major or going into law? Sometimes I wish I was just
normal. I'm not being cocky when I say I'm talented. I acknowledge that I can do things that others can't and I'm very intelligent. But sometimes I wish I really was average. It would be so much easier to find someone compatible. And that's the biggest problem. When you strive for greatness, and you reach it, it's hard to find someone who has done the same.
It's lonely at the top.
*sighs* To wait at the top or step down to join the common man to have a companion?
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